Greystone House Montessori Schools Houston, Texas. Child care Montessori provider in Champions, The Woodlands, Spring Texas Greystone House Montessori Schools Houston
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CONTROL POINTS
Every person needs the ability to achieve. Out of achievement comes respect and place in the community. One of the most powerful insults in segments of our society is to “dis” (disrespect) someone. For our little children, we must respect their struggle to direct their own behavior and resist adult control. Children who are over-controlled can be delayed in their emotional growth and probably will rebel in later years. But control is a fine line. In fact, you are the parent and it’s your responsibility to accept that role. There has to be an adult in the house. Here are some hints:

• Foster your child’s growing independence and self-direction in positive ways. For example, encourage your child to feed himself. If some foods are too difficult, use simpler foods. Typically, simpler foods are more nutri-tious anyway. Let your child dress and wash herself. Praise a good job without dwelling on mistakes or parts left undone. Casually provide help only as it is truly needed.

• Give your child developmentally appropriate choices. When you offer choices, abide by your child’s decision. Be careful not to offer choices when your child really doesn’t have a choice, as in ”Are you coming or not?” and “Okay?”

• Childproof the areas your child will be in as much as possible. This is more an art than a science. Children need to be exposed gradually to more and more things of which they need to be careful. As they make little mis-takes, they learn. • When you do have to exert control, do it quickly, cheerfully, and matter-of-factly with a minimum of talk. Ignore protests. When you give in, the child quickly learns that protesting is an effective way to get what he wants. That makes the next controversy take longer because your child has learned to just hang in there and you’ll change your mind. Consistency is extremely important here.

• Be proud of your child’s self-direction and independence. It’s a sign of social and emotional growth. You have provided the confidence and the trusting environment that has enabled her to “test” power and independence. It’s also a sign that you have done a good job as a parent.

• Express your feelings of displeasure and disappointment when your child openly defies you. However, be careful of going so far as punishment for new-found independence and skepticism. Punishment leaves the child feeling powerless and can hinder social and emotional growth. Punishment teaches nothing of value and typically has only a temporary effect at best.

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