Parenting is hard. As much as we see and can support with evidence the effectiveness of our methods when it comes to both educating and working with the behavior of children in the age groups we support, we also know that adopting these methods consistently is difficult for parents. We are all passionate about our children and we also come to the table with biases, influences, and a lifetime of experiences that may have us convinced that trying different things is either unnecessary or doomed to fail.
The toddler age group is generally seen as one of the more challenging when it comes to parenting. We are prone to disagree. While parents and toddler's alike may struggle at times with the limited communication abilities that come with the age, it turns out that there is one big thing you can do to get your toddler engaged and happy. Put them to work.
Good outcomes, regardless of where they begin, are the result of a lot of work. Outside of starting someone down the path toward examining something, quotes are – in our opinion - useless and frequently harmful. You will never really be able to understand a subject, an event, or especially a human being (including yourself), from a quote.
Montessori facilitates an environment where children are free to explore, learn, and grow safely while providing guides to support children along the path. One assumption underlying this approach is that children are owners and active participants in their own lives who are capable of doing things on their own. We would go so far as to say that children begin to really own the choices that drive their lives and that they start growing apart from us from the second they are born. Controversial? Well, no. It is literally true the instant the cord is cut. As parents and educators we become blameworthy for developmental failures when we are accomplices in creating "adult children" rather than adults. This generally happens when we fail to become the guide that helps another human being desire to be in charge of creating their own story (hopefully one that is meaningful and fulfilling). The child that grows into an adult is the child that has had plenty of practice building the skills and traits that differentiate an adult from a 6 foot tall toddler.
Years ago, we came across an article written by a parent at a Houston Montessori school. In the article, the parent describes Montessori as Libertarian with a capital L. If we are being honest, we would tend to say the article "rationalizes" more than describes.
Making choices starts early in Montessori. As soon as an infant begins rolling on the floor in a Montessori classroom they are able to start making choices that direct what they will do next. While these choices may not be as conscious as the choices adults make, much of the circuitry used gets exercised in a similar fashion. As a child progresses both within and across the classrooms they make more complex choices every day. This self-directed learning is the beginning of a self-directed life. We consistently argue that a self-directed life is one the owner of that life will value more than if it is directed for them. So how is it that you as parents can ensure your children are building a life they value and developing the critical wiring they need to make the choices that will facilitate that life?
Staring at public data is generally a pretty good way to alleviate stress about many of the negatives we perceive in the United States (assuming you have the mathematical literacy to understand what you are seeing). While there is still a lot of room for improvement, particularly with regard to other countries, crime rates have been experiencing a very big downward trend since the early 1990s, overall life expectancy is going up, and numerous categories of accidents have shown marked improvements. But education is an area where the outlook isn't quite as positive.
Earth Day occurs this week and that means a number of things to us. First and foremost - at Greystone House it means we will be outside as much as the weather allows. We love that and so do the preschool aged children we support.
After decades of noting these patterns, I have seen some clear characteristics emerge in the people that I have come to admire - and in many cases - call friends. Many of these characteristics are rooted in the Montessori education.
Every once in a while we hear a statement that makes us recoil. That is "Montessori just lets children do whatever they want". We have even heard this from people who would otherwise be trustworthy when it comes to information, people who are generally regarded as cautious prior to reporting information. Unfortunately, on occasion, these people are on platforms that are capable of spreading information - good and bad - very rapidly.
One of our favorite activities at the school is gardening. We have kept plants in the curriculum as, among other things, a way to teach the children about growing food. As usual with Montessori, the best way is the hands-on way. Watch the edges of the playground and you will notice a series of box planters. Over the years these have yielded some wonderful classroom treats.
We know that more than a few of our parents were Montessori educated themselves, but for those who weren't we offer up our belief that it is never too late. Below are some suggestions for how we can all become Montessori adults.
ne of our favorite attributes of Montessori is the emphasis on freedom. Within our environment freedom focuses on numerous things, but we will look at four today. Freedom to choose the work they will do, the freedom to repeat work until it is mastered without respect to time, the freedom to move about the classroom, and the freedom to help others. When compared to a traditional classroom or even to daycare these concepts of freedom are quite radical.
Compassion, which differs from empathy, is defined as a consciousness of the distress and suffering of others that drives a sympathetic response to help alleviate it. There is a growing body of evidence that compassion is in many ways an innate instinct rather than a learned value and it appears in varying degrees depending on the person. We see this quite strongly in some children at school where they are immediately concerned if another child so much as groans in discomfort.
Courage is a moral strength. It allows us to move forward in the face of fear, challenges and even real danger. We say that those with courage are brave. But at times it seems that we limit the definition of what it means to be brave to a narrow band of seemingly heroic acts. Courage and bravery can seem relegated to warriors and superheroes. And this is a shame, because we see acts of courage every day at school that…
While she is remembered for the innovative and lasting education method that bears her name, Maria Montessori was much more. She was a physician, a scientist, a tireless activist for women's rights, and an advocate for peace. To Dr. Montessori, the hope for a true and lasting peace was tied up in the education of children. A moral education focused on a respect for diversity, citizenship and acceptance of personal responsibility was at the center of her hope for the future.
Honor means we possess the traits of honesty, fairness and integrity. These are high goals to be sure. They are truly challenging to exhibit consistently as we are all flawed human beings. But somewhere along the line striving to be honorable went from being required if you were to be admired to being seen by many as an impossibility and thus not even worth working toward. Cynicism not only crept in; it took over.
Joy is an emotion or a feeling - right? By definition it is an emotion of great delight or happiness or the expression of a glad feeling. So why include joy in a list of values that we seek to imbue the children with if it is in fact not a value? This is precisely the conversation my wife and I found ourselves in when revisiting how we do "Greystone House things" earlier this week.
When adults have six definitions for a word it is a foregone conclusion that it is not easily definable to young children. But thankfully, justice as we use it is very demonstrable. As we use the term, we are referring to the moral principle that emphasizes objective evaluation and equal, fair treatment of others.
No need to worry
We read every form submission. If you asked us to get back to you, we will. Otherwise, know that we hear you and are happy for the inputs. And don’t worry about spam. We hate it too – so you won’t get it from us.
Don’t worry, we aren’t verbose
We very occasionally send out cool bits of info, but we never spam. And if you lose interest we promise we won’t be offended. Everything we send out has an unsubscribe link so you can control your own relationship with us (which is of course how it should be).
