This will be our second year without a Father’s Day Breakfast. We hope it is not only our last event to be lost (we are figuring out the possibilities for the luau), but that we can all take a moment in the absence of the breakfast and let the men in our lives know that we appreciate them. And let them know why. You will likely have unique reasons why the special men in your life are worthy of your praise. For us, the following characteristics are things we can’t help but admire.
Collaboration – we admire men who seek to collaborate with others to build things that last. Rather than relying on hubris, collaborators realize their limitations and seek to fill the gaps in order to be their best.
Compassion – when others are hurting, whether children, friends, or people they do not know, our favorite men feel the pain and take compassion on those who suffer.
Courage – whether standing against dishonorable actions or risking their own safety, men who courageously represent good values are heros in our minds. Courage is easily spoken, but when we see it in action we know we have found someone to count on.
Frugality – men who understand that waste benefits nobody are men we love. Whether saving money for the future, replacing the resources they use, or foregoing that shiny new toy to ensure that there is a little extra available in an emergency, being connected to these men means seeing a clear example of how to live on a daily basis.
Honor – honorable men do not lie to benefit themselves, value things that are themselves honorable, act in a trustworthy manner, and behave as if each action they take will be the final word on their headstone.
Humility – in a world run amok with rampant egocentrism, the humble man stands out from his peers. He knows he cannot know everything, is open to hearing and understanding all sides, and admits when he is wrong. That last one is so incredibly important to being a father that we should probably print it twice.
Joy – our favorite men have a sense of joy that they have discovered. Joy may stem from a hobby, from the interactions with good friends, from the accomplishments they work for, or simply from a properly framed outlook on life.
Justice – our favorite Dad’s are the ones who impartially evaluate the mischief their (and other’s) children get into and ensure that a fair resolution is reached. This is part art and science, but I still admire the Dad’s I was around when I was a kid who could pull off this feat.
Kindness – a kind man is a man you will recognize a number of ways. He will have children attached to his leg. He will have friends at his side. He will have a partner who trusts him to do the right thing. Give them a hug when you see one. They tend to like it.
Peace – a man on the edge raises eyebrows and makes many of us wonder where they lost their way. A man at peace is one we ask “how did you get here, and how may I follow?”.
Responsibility – responsible men own mistakes, own their job, and own their outlook. They do what they say and say what they do. If you ask them to do something and they say yes, you will never doubt that it will be done.
Self-reliance – men who believe in themselves because they live their values and know they will take the actions needed to fill in their own weaknesses are the very embodiment of self-reliance.
Wisdom – wise men know that a truth worth believing will benefit everyone, not just themselves and their friends.
Leadership – men who lead should tick every box above (or almost all of them). Leading is serious business and requires seriously capable people.
If this sounds like our list of values we reinforce at the schools, that isn’t an accident. It goes without saying that we seek the same signs of character in women. But many of these, particularly the items that require reflection, are still frequently reinforced in girls more than in boys – and we all suffer as a result. We know nobody masters all of these, but it is sure great watching someone try hard. Like we said at the beginning of this blog – when you see the men in your life giving it their all – let them know you appreciate it.
Happy Father’s Day Dads. We are so glad you are here.
